lately i have really been struggling with the feeling of blessing others. you know those people in your life, even if you've only met them once or a few times, that just bless people by simply being themselves? sometimes you can even see them on tv, that they just reach out to people around them. this is what i long for. i long to have an effect on others around me in a positive way, so that others can see the Creator in my life.

i recently read sex god by rob bell. (more on this to come, as i digest it all.) one of the chapters talks about the love that Johnny Cash shared with June Carter Cash and how it just spilled over and affected the lives of everyone around them. they were able to affect all of the people that saw them perform, heard their music, watched them interact together, just by being themselves.

i want that.

i want people to look at me and say "i want to know her."

i want people to look at me and say "she is a blessing."

i want people to look at me and say "Christ is living in her."

one of my good friends was baptized while i was home over Easter, and she had such an amazing testimony to share. she has grown up in a Christian home, but the way she talked about God and what he's done in her life was like she was talking about her best friend, her lover, her other half. and that is what He is to her. i was so blessed by her outward declaration of faith, but it also really got me thinking about what ways i show that Jesus is the difference in my life. i want others to know that i am His, whether they meet me for 30 seconds or have known me for 15 years. it is something i long for and am seriously going to pray about. any thoughts or advice or encouragement welcome.


on a lighter note, i LOVED being home for Easter, even though it was only for the weekend. i have come to the conclusion that my parents can really be close friends, and being home really demonstrated that for me. i spent a lot of time just hanging out with them, and i loved it.

i also recently ran in the pittsburgh marathon, which was, in one word, deadly. lets just say i didn't go to work the next day due the the fact that i could barely get out of bed, and when i did it was an adventure just walking down the hallway.

work is work, the most exciting parts recently being 3 total hip replacements and a 6 week old river otter from the zoo presenting symptoms of distempter and broken ribs from it's mom beating it up. it was adorable and possibly the only chance i'll get to hold a baby river otter.

home again with almost the entire family and boyfriend in T-8 days. CAN'T WAIT.