i miss josh. sometimes i like the fact that he is in the Navy, but sometimes it makes me really sad. like now. however, i am proud of him and proud he is going to dive school. pray for him hardcore ok? he needs it. pray for strength and energy to survive having his hands and feet tied together in the pool, to survive a 1000 meter swim in open water while only using his feet, no hands, in less than 23 minutes. i would drown. pray that he would find a church and get into a spiritual routine while he's down there. pray that he wouldn't be tempted by other things and would stay strong in the Lord.

by the way, this is a picture of his submarine, the U.S.S. Toledo, SSN 769. it's way way cool. i got to go on it all sneaky-like (not really) and see where he works and what he does and where he sleeps. it was awesome. although it was a boatful of dudes, which was a little intimidating cause they never see girls on board. but hey. whatever. i can better understand why it is a good thing to have contact with the outside world when underway.

p.s. i've decided to join the Navy SEALs. think G.I. Jane.

well. time for an update wouldn't you say?

ok. so. lots has happened. can't really think of it all. hmm Independence Day was nice but not what i expected. i wanted to do something so cool and fun and patriotic and I-Love-My-Country like but it just didn't happen. the Angerosa's came over for dessert and birthday cake (happy birthday mommy!) and then we did fireworks in the backyard. we ended up venturing out to the Cheshire fireworks, and they were awesome. definitely the best fireworks i've ever seen. i wanted to go to Mystic to watch theirs but it never happened. then i wanted to go to Sailfest's on Saturday in New London because they are supposed to be the best on the Eastern seaboard but that didn't happen either. oh well.

i babysat for the Angerosa kids for 24 hours that week and had a blast. we played with the Slip n Slide, built a castle, went to Wendy's for dinner, made cinnamon rolls, got snowcones, the kids rode Spot..it was a fun experience. we had a tage sale on the 9th to raise money for Haiti at their house...i think i saw them every day for 8 days straight. we made our own commune.

last friday was the anniversary of the day Grammy died. it was a sad day. i bought my mom flowers because i would catch her crying. we did a lot of crying that day. i miss my Grammy. i miss her laugh, her saying "hello Dolly" when i called her, her smell, her hugs, the sound her slippers made as she shuffled across the kitchen. i miss waking up and giving her a kiss in the morning as she sits at the table with her coffee, always in a cup and saucer, never in a mug. i miss laying on her bed watching CSI with her, listening for a bell ringing in the night to signal a problem. i miss the quiet hiss of her oxygen machine close to the end, the nebulizer treatments, the hospice care. i don't miss watching her body shut down on her, when her mind was just as sharp and witty, but if it meant she was here, i'd take it anyday. i miss the past, the trips to the mall to pick out a new outfit for Christmas, spending a month at her apartment in the summer, sleepovers in her bed (watching out for Yatsu of course). i miss her voice, her robes, fixing her hair, painting her nails. i miss her, i miss her, i miss her. Love you Grammy.

friday was also Jonathan Ridley's 17th birthday, so i went to their house for dinner, then to his baseball game to cheer him on. we made huge signs and embarrassed him very badly. he loved it though.

saturday was Benjamin's 19th birthday. happy birthday dear!!! i miss my best friend lots and lots.

also on saturday i went down to norwich and hung out with the one of a kind Joshua Toth. we went to the mystic aquarium (finally!!) and saw beluga wales, touched sting rays, a starfish, and a crab, and saw lots of funky animals. we watched a sea lion show which was awesome and i'm going to get one now. and keep it in my bathtub. after that we went on base and bought stuff to make chocolate chip cookies at the commissary, then went and baked them and ate them. we watched million dollar baby (sad but really good) and ordered bacon and pineapple pizza. the pizza came half and half instead of both on all of it, so we made sandwiches. it was fun. he put on his dress blues for me too. just because i asked him to. isn't he nice? i miss him a lot. he is leaving for dive school for six weeks (i think) this week and i won't see him until Christmas and then he'll be on deployment Jan-June next year and it's really really really sad. and i miss him a lot a lot. he has become one of my best friends, which is strange really if you think about it, not because of him, because i said hi to him for about 4 months once a week. then he left for far away places and was awesome enough to keep in touch. he's my favorite Navy submariner. actually my favorite Navy anything. actually the only person i know in the Navy. but he knows he's my favorite anyway.

yesterday was church, the barn, and hanging out with people at the boys apartment all night. we went to Ruby Tuesdays and ate and watched old home videos of our friends. oh the joy of knowing your friends for 10 years.

today was work work work, then tutoring. no bible study. read and ate an MRE for dinner!!!! out on the garage floor. it was a-MAZ-ing. lets just say it's probably the most fun i've had eating dinner by myself. it was chicken tettrazini and a chocolate milkshake and a cookie and crackers and blackberry jam. so fun. i loved it.

so that's it, consider yourself updated. if you care to know more, then ask.

prayer requests:
i'm lonely. my 3 best friends in the entire world have left and i don't know when i will see them again. miss you guys.
going back to school. don't want to. enough said.
chemistry. calculus. genetics. enough said there too.
mohammed. ask. i'll tell.
jesse. in Iraq being a cool nurse. for wisdom and energy to make it through long 12 hour workdays
dan grundman. in indonesia for 16 days helping with tsunami relief. comes back the 30th.
josh. dive school.
billy. christian friends, struggling with a lot of things i am.
my dad. his job.

sometimes i stop and realize i have a truly amazing life and even better friends to go with it.
yeah that's it. <3